Browsing Archive: December, 2010

Concerns over forthcoming Eastenders plot

Posted by Samara Collins on Thursday, December 16, 2010, In : Article

I'm not a soap fan, but it has been highlighted to me recently that Eastenders are going to be running a storyline in the new year that gives me and many other mothers who have lost children much cause for concern.

As you can read on the website (http://www.bbc.co.uk/eastenders/ a female character called Ronnie will have a still born baby. Its a tough plot line but I think its good that this will raise awareness of SIDS. However, Ronnie will then abduct another woman's baby in this story. T...
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15/12/10

Posted by Samara Collins on Wednesday, December 15, 2010, In : Blog

I think my blogs are so dull and depressing right now. I am hoping that things will get easier after the new year. This month feels horrible and I just want it to be over.

I have been hibernating lots recently. I just find that I'm at a low point as just missing Sadie so badly and that along with fear of getting even lower leads me to avoid crowds and people in general. I don't like being this way and don't intend to let this continue but right now it is so hard. Its a very isolating feel...
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13/12/10 - My First Birthday Without Sadie

Posted by Samara Collins on Monday, December 13, 2010, In : Blog

Well I have nearly made it through my first birthday after losing Sadie. It has hit me like a truck. I could barely sleep last night feeling so sad and this morning I found fresh grief. All I want for my Birthday is to hold Sadie in my arms. Even just for a minute. That will never be possible and I miss her so badly, its a physical feeling. I spent a long time in her nursery this morning just holding her things and eventually I felt a little better.

Mum and Dad came over and listened to m...
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12/12/10

Posted by Samara Collins on Sunday, December 12, 2010, In : Blog

Well the end oflast week was tough and in particular the 3 month anniversary of Sadie's death. I'm amazed at how hard that is. I barely moved off the sofa all day and felt so low. It is scary feeling that low because its hard to imagine feeling normal again.

Drew cheered me up when he came home. He'd been out for lunch and drinks with his colleagues to celebrate Christmas (he's miles ahead of me and much braver!). As he'd got in a friend's car for a lift home, his friend's wife had expres...
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08/12/10

Posted by Samara Collins on Wednesday, December 8, 2010, In : Blog

Its so hard to believe that Sadie has been gone from our lives for 3 months on Friday. This is a hard month as (as per previous blogs) the run up to Christmas is tough without Sadie here to share it with us. In addition, Sadie's first Birthday is on 30/12 and then New Years Eve will also be tough.

Last NYE was the worst day of our lives as we were told the shocking news that Sadie had Edwards Syndrome and would die very soon. There was nothing we could do. Its a blurr in many ways. I reme...
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