Showing Tag: "syndrome" (Show all posts)

Preparing for Sadie's 3rd Birthday

Posted by Samara Collins on Saturday, December 29, 2012, In : Blog 
We had a lovely Christmas with 13 of us on Christmas day for dinner at our house. We really value our family time and enjoyed spending such a fun Christmas with Pat.  We managed our grief fairly well although we missed Sadie as always.

After all the energy of Christmas Drew and I feel wiped out and have hibernated a little - just going for walks and playing with Pat.  We have found the sadness heavy in our hearts.  We are well used to this now and know how to handle this but it often means let...
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A funny old day

Posted by Samara Collins on Wednesday, January 25, 2012, In : Blog 
Well today I went down south for a team meeting.  We flew down, which was a bit strange for me.  Hard to explain, but I guess a combo of things... I've not flown since before being pregnant with Sadie and I felt flustered (although I hope I hod it relatively well). Also, just the feeling again of things being at 'normal pace' which seems poles apart from our true normality.  I still sometimes feel like I have been plunged back into a parallel universe and inside I am a grieving mum, but my ex...
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08/12/10

Posted by Samara Collins on Wednesday, December 8, 2010, In : Blog 
Its so hard to believe that Sadie has been gone from our lives for 3 months on Friday.  This is a hard month as (as per previous blogs) the run up to Christmas is tough without Sadie here to share it with us.  In addition, Sadie's first Birthday is on 30/12 and then New Years Eve will also be tough.

Last NYE was the worst day of our lives as we were told the shocking news that Sadie had Edwards Syndrome and would die very soon.  There was nothing we could do.  Its a blurr in many ways.  I reme...
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26/11/10

Posted by Samara Collins on Friday, November 26, 2010, In : Blog 
Quick update as I am very tired and getting a headache, so considering an afternoon snooze...

Its been a busy week with counselling, a visit to Francis House and a trip to the Lake District along with seeing friends and family.  This week hasn't felt quite so tough.  Some days are still very low but it feels like it may be getting easier, which is good as Christmas and Sadie's first Birthday are fast approaching and are likely to be tough.  Who knows... next week could be low again.  There is ...
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18/11/10

Posted by Samara Collins on Thursday, November 18, 2010, In : Blog 

I've been fairly busy recently.  Busy doing nothing much really!  Its funny to think I began my maternity leave nearly a year ago.  I took a month's holiday at the start so my maternity leave officially ends on 01/01/11, but I was made redundant after Sadie was born so I also have the weird and fairly unpleasant feeling of being unemployed.  Either way, being without my baby and being off work feels strange and unfair in many ways.  I feel like I'm just wasting time, but then I remember that ...


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07/11/10 (Edwards' Syndrome)

Posted by Samara Collins on Sunday, November 7, 2010, In : Blog 
Friday was a good day for lifting my spirits. I felt a lot better after visiting the Reverend and I have felt much stronger these past couple of days.   Drew and I went to his sister and her boyfriend's house last night for a takeaway and had a great evening with family.

I have bought materials now from Hobbycraft so that I can make a special book (Sadie's Star) for our son-to-be. I hope I can get my creative hat on this week as I am also embroidering (yes, you read right!) a picture for our l...
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29/10/10 - Emails

Posted by Samara Collins on Friday, October 29, 2010, In : Blog 
I just wanted to say how wonderful it is to be receving so many emails from other parents / parents to be who have been finding my sites useful.  I find it really encouraging to know that the sites are helpful to others as well as to myself.  Its always a risk being so open about such personal things but I find it very cathartic and I also wanted to put my experiences out there as I know I find it so helpful reading other peoples' blogs as it makes me feel less alone in my feelings.

I have had...
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10/10/2010

Posted by Samara Collins on Sunday, October 10, 2010, In : Blog 
Its so hard to believe a month ago today we lost our precious Sadie.  Although I have a website all about Sadie (http://sadiecollins.yolasite.com/) I wanted to keep that purely about Sadie.  As I go through the process of grieving for Sadie, I really want touse this site as an outlet to talk about my experiences.  I find writing cathartic for one thing but also perhaps other parents and families may find this helpful - who knows?

I have written 2 articles for SOFT (Support Organisation for Fam...
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Below are 2 articles I have written for the SOFT Newlsetter.  SOFT is a charity Support Organisation for Families of Trisomy. 

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Article 2.docx Article 2.docx
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About Me


Samara Collins I'm Samara Collins (nee Samara Lawrence) and I'm 35 years old. I live in a village called Mobberley in Cheshire with my husband Drew, our son, Patrick (born 17/02/11) and our cat, Clive. Our daughter, Sadie was born on 30/12/09. 24 hours after her birth we were told she had Edwards Syndrome (Trisomy 18) and a large VSD (hole in her heart) and would die very soon. She passed away aged 8 & 1/2 months on 10/09/10. Sadie was our first child and she was a wonderful surprise after 18 months of trying to conceive and then being told I was infertile! She is our miracle. I immediately loved being a mummy and miss Sadie terribly. I was made redundant shortly after Sadie was born. We are strong but we still focus on remaining so and on maintaining normality and enjoying our son, Pat. Grieving is a weird process and totally unavoidable. I think I'm doing OK most days but when I need to express myself and the grief becomes overwhelming and isolating I find writing really helps me.

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